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Sprawling Resort to House Unaccompanied Minors Proposed for Pageland Lane

Prince William County has been gripped with controversy over what the future of development in the Rural Crescent will look like and a new player has entered the fray.

Sources tell The Rural Lune landowners have been presented with an alternative - and perhaps more lucrative - option to selling to data center developers. The Reston-based Cabrón Partners, LLC is quietly proposing a 1,500 acre resort to house children apprehended trying to enter the United States illegally at the U.S./Mexico border.

Jeanette H. Lybarger, Senior Managing Director of Woke Development for CBRE, confirmed that the commercial real estate services and investment firm is representing the developers of the project, but declined to comment on whether Prince William County is one of the locations being considered.

“As with any potential real estate transaction of this size it will be a spreadsheet decision,” says Lybarger. “Right now, companies are all asking the same questions when considering an investment of this size: how much environmental degradation and erosion of white western culture can we get for our money?”

Supporters of the project tout the benefits it will bring to the community.

“Many jobs will be created caring for these youth. Activities staff, masseurs, waiters, Farsi tutors, and all sort of other professionals will need to be hired,” says Tiara Ortiz of Pave Over the Rural Crescent (PORC), an anti-quality of life advocacy group based in Gainesville, Virginia.

“When they turn 18 years of age, each client housed at the facility will matriculate into the community with $1 million dollars, a house in Thunder Oaks, and a brand new Honda Civic,” says Ortiz. “Just think about that that will do for the local economy!”

Prince William Board of County Supervisors Chair Ann Wheeler isn’t yet commenting on whether the county would support such a development, but some local opponents of the development say the writing is on the wall.

“Read the tea leaves on this deal. It's not hard to see how this will play out,” says Bob Weir, famed rhythm guitarist for the Grateful Dead turned local politics firebrand.

“Area residents should treat this as a done deal,” says Weir. “We know the Board is actively seeking ways to destroy the rural crescent, and this gives them a mechanism to do so not only through the direct development of the Pageland Corridor, but also by paving the way for expansive taqueria development throughout the county’s remaining rural land.”

Those familiar with the details of the proposal say that while the real driver is profits, the Prince William County location offers more.

“This high-profile deal is about the money,” says an anonymous source close to the deal,” but government handouts are not the only factor that make Prince William County the leading location for this project.”

“President Biden is personally working nights at the Bureau of Engraving and Printing, with contract support from the Open Society Institute, to print billions of dollars in support of this project. Since all that cash needs to be delivered covertly from D.C. in rented U-Haul trucks, the Pageland Lane site simplifies logistics big time.”